4 July, 2009

wordsalso:

RANKING OF PRESIDENTS
(By how dirty their names sound)
1. Johnson
2. Bush
3. Harding
4. Polk
5. Filmore
7. LBJ
8. Hoover
9. Bush
10. Clinton

4 July, 2009
barthel:

stryker:
America: where we always think things used to be better because we misunderstand the present.

Barthel’s point reminds me of the prescriptivist mindset: “I can’t tell you when the golden age of x was but it’s not now!”

barthel:

stryker:

America: where we always think things used to be better because we misunderstand the present.

Barthel’s point reminds me of the prescriptivist mindset: “I can’t tell you when the golden age of x was but it’s not now!”

3 July, 2009
recursion!

recursion!

3 July, 2009
Technology is incredible!

Technology is incredible!

3 July, 2009

Here is some writing, since we lack it

At Least I Can Legally Drive Again
Dec. 16th, 2004. 02:21 pm

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: “Rebellion (Lies)” by Arcade Fire

I just returned from the DMV, and I am still recovering from the bureaucratic trauma—the horrors of red tape! Actually, it wasn’t that eventful, mainly because this was an express DMV and I arrived during a lull. Everything went smoothly and efficiently, which kinda disappointed me. I expected this to be a hellish ordeal, hours upon hours wasted in queue. I wanted to make it a daylong event; I planned on bringing a picnic lunch and a novel to read. Moreover, I wanted to see some shit go down—some rowdy woman arguing and screaming at the person at the desk, until some special forces with riot shields and mace deploy from a nondescript room, sirens scorching my eardrums and the obligatory Code Red lights twirling a mesh of red overhead, lasso-like, and the words Lockdown Procedure being repeated by a recording of woman who sounds as if her nose houses an insect infestation. So much for expectations.

After the quick and anticlimactic wait, I received my new license from a man resembling a black Bic ballpoint pen. As he handed me the card, I noticed he never said my name, which offend me a little—he hand no trouble announcing to Dave and Hank that they were ready, but Tristan?, no, he didn’t deserve a mention. And I saw my photo, and I made the same face as that in the photo, a weird apathetic cringe to my face, as though I had just fed a vampire. My hair, currently much too lengthy by my standards and thinned by the abrasive winter air, looks twice as long and voluminous as it should. This is because there is a shadow behind my head, and it causes a weird doubling effect for my hair, not unlike slightly crossing your eyes while looking at something.

I wanted to ask if anything could be done about the photo, but the conversation that played in mind didn’t seem promising:

—Are you sure, I can’t do anything? —I ask him.

—What could I possibly do? Photoshop it?

—Well, yeah. I don’t think it’s too much to ask.

—You’ve got to be kidding me. What do you take me for?

I want to say —One gun purchase away from a postal worker, —but I realize that he might in fact have a loaded gun behind the counter, hidden behind office tools, slightly visible through the jaws of a stapler. So I tell him —Um, I don’t think that’s a fair question.

—Real clever, —he says, laughing dryly, his thin body quivering skeletally, a leafless tree rattling in autumn winds— I see we have a comedian on our hands.

—Look. What if I give you twenty dollars? —I offer, suddenly wishing I could revoke the deal.

—What? —he asks, the word leaving his mouth like soldiers diving from a crashing plane— Get the fuck out of here!

***

I guess I just have to live with this identification picture—this identity!—for the next eight years. Fuck.

3 July, 2009

There is a distinct lack of writers on Tumblr

shutupinternet:

There’s such a distinct lack of text content on Tumblr that breaks even 100 words in a post, it’s pretty sad. I’m sure there are some fantastic writers out there, some fantastic thinkers too but where is their representation?

[snip]

The most popular Tumblelog classified under “writer” has three pictures of Miley Cyrus on its first page and a total of one hundred and forty three words. To anyone who writes significant amounts on Tumblr, like myself, frankly that is pretty insulting.

[snip]

Everyone calm down and follow Mills, one of my favorite writers period.

3 July, 2009

Serious Business

Following her recent 4H trip to Washington D.C., my little sister (The Gorb*) joined a Facebook group called “I Hate [redacted]”, [redacted] being one of her trip chaperones. Gorb claims it was an accidental “accept”, but I would have done it as a service to 4H. Today Gorb receives a letter from the county’s 4H agent demanding an apology letter to [redacted] and a notice that she has been barred from such trips in the future.

*All names have replaced lest 4H agents are roaming tumblr.

2 July, 2009
2 July, 2009
The ddx says FAIL.

The ddx says FAIL.

2 July, 2009

Here at Language Log Plaza, we’ve been following the linguistic angles of the Gov. Mark Sanford story ever since he mysteriously went “out of pocket.” (See: “Out of pocket,” “The biggest self of self is indeed self,” “Doing stupid,” and “If I wanted to know that I knew that I knew.”) But the lasting contribution of the Sanford saga to the English language may very well be the sudden spawning of a political euphemism: “hiking the Appalachian trail.

Language Log » Birth of a euphemism: “Hiking the Appalachian trail”

1 July, 2009
yoshang:

The Big Picture | Recent scenes from the ISS
Roads and circular fields in the desert in Egypt

No way.

yoshang:

The Big Picture | Recent scenes from the ISS

Roads and circular fields in the desert in Egypt

No way.

1 July, 2009

"Verb" Clothing

annagrams:

  • Transitive with respect to the wearer: sweater, leg warmer, suspenders, choker
  • Transitive with respect to the elements: windbreaker, flipper, clodhopper
  • Transitive with respect to the clothing, i.e. passive voice: pullover, slipper
  • Intransitive: bloomers*
  • Assisting the wearer in action (though not, necessarily, directly inducing it): jumper, romper, sneaker, boxers, loafer, boater, deerstalker
*named after a person, but the action fits nicely

instafollow

30 June, 2009
“Trying to win Stacy back by killing an animal. Very caveman of you.”
But Wilson is still the best.

“Trying to win Stacy back by killing an animal. Very caveman of you.”

But Wilson is still the best.